Hi again! It’s me, Anahita! Today wasn’t very interesting, basically just waking up at 10 and waiting for 8 and a 1/2 hours for Life With Derek to come on.  As usual, it didn’t disappoint. Today’s episode was- Casey’s mom keeps trying to talk her into into babysitting Marti. Casey is angry and wants to make Derek babysit for a change. Things change when a) Casey’s mom offers her 12 bucks per hour, and now Casey wants the job b) The new girl Derek wants to impress likes kids, and Derek had invited her home so that they can babysit her together, so now Derek wants the job.  The episode is all about that. And I totally loved it. As usual. And can’t think about anything else. As usual. Anyways, now coming to the stuff I did today. I found a GREAT song titled Boulevard of Broken Dreams- Green Day. It’s kinda Rock with a really catchy beat and slightly mournful music (which is COMPLETELY my type-DONT TELL ANYONE!!). Okay, so maybe I like dark and broody music.  Yeah, that’s true, which is why Evanescence (Especially- Bring me to life-Evan…) has sung more than one of the songs I really like.  *shakes head to clear thoughts*Back to the singer (and more cheery songs), her name is Colbie Caillat. I heard one of her songs, ‘Bubbly’ and became a fan, went crazy, and downloaded, erm, 10 more of her songs. I know, I know, it’s a bit crazy, but hey, she’s a good singer… Besides, I need more songs on my IPod. I have just 700 songs on it. And it’s an 80 gb IPod. Which means it can store around 25000 songs. Bit of a waste of space huh? I think it’s a bit more than a bit. Whoa! My blog posts are getting longer and longer! I guess I’m getting more used to blogging. In fact, I feel like doing it everyday! I can’t believe there’s not even a month left for school to re-open!! I mean, it’s as though school got over yesterday! And it’s reopening in less than 25 days! I don’t know if I’m sad or happy about that.. If it was any other year, I would be quite excited as it would mean an end to my boredom (not that I dont like holidays, I love them, but still… it does get boring) but not this year. Know why? Because its the year before I write my boards. The thought makes me feel nauseated. I just can’t imagine myself writing my boards, similar to how I can’t imagine Tanu (That’s short for Nitika, one of my best friends for around 6 years, who, sadly got transferred 2-3 years back ) writing them. And she’s going to write them THIS YEAR. Okay enough about the boards, they’re seriously creeping me out. I wish I could just, you know, rewind 5 years and play, so that I could go back to being Daddy’s little girl (i am, even now, but still… its more realistic when you’re LITTLE, although I will always be little to my parents as I have an elder sister.) and the cute, curly-haired, little brat of the family. (I’m still curly-haired though, but definitely not cute or little anymore) Although I wish I could be I guess there’s no way that’s going to happen, but I can’t help thinking about it… I think the point where I thought most about this (actually, wanted it the most) was when I got 87% in English. Let me explain- I LOVE English. And It’s like, one of the only subjects I’m good at and I’m actually interested in (although, I really love computer too, but its not really a main subject like English). And so, I had my heart set on this Proficiency which is awarded to the person  with the highest total at the end of the year. It’s awarded during the year after the great performance bt a student (That’s the coming year for me.) That meant I had to have great marks all throughout the year. I really wanted this, I think more than I’ve ever wanted anything. Mainly because, I’ve always been an average student,  I really wanted to show everyone that I could be great at something I really had my mind on. So I had to be keep up great marks in English the entire year. And I really wanted to. And I did, until the second-last exam of the year, when I went slightly down in the eyes of every other student, but in my eyes, I had failed. I couldn’t help it. I started crying as soon as I recieved my paper, in front of the class, something which I’ve never done before.  Everyone else thought this was a bit extreme, mainly because I hadn’t told almost anyone that I was aiming for the proficiency, except my best friend, Priyanka, though I don’t think she really cared. Maybe she thought there was no way I could get it. Maybe she was right. The worst part was that (I feel awful for saying this), Priyanka got 90%, highest of the class, and, although there was no way she could ever reach my total, I was still feeling terrible, and (again, I feel terrible for saying this), I was all- How could SHE get it and not ME. I guess it was a huge blow, especially since I had been so confident. I cried for the next two periods (those were the last two, thankfully). While going home, people kept asking me if I was okay, so I went all smiley. Then, I maintained my smiley face until I reached home and all the way till the night because I didn’t want to cry in front of my family and have them ask me what was wrong again. So I just told them I got my english marks and told them my marks. They were happy. I wasn’t. I cried for the next three nights. And maybe I’m doing it right now. I guess, then things started getting okay again, (not entirely though) and it turned out, Priyanka had told one of her other good friends that she felt really bad for me crying, who came and told me. I really felt bad, apologised and all that, but I still don’t know if I’ll get my Proficiency next year, but whoever does, whether I know the person or not, I’m going to clap just as hard for him/her as I would have before I started aiming for the proficiency when their name is announced. Okay, I’m going now, will write again tomorrow.